I am all about supporting you to practice self- care and nurturing, and getting in touch with your own wisdom.
We are bombarded from birth with images of how we should look, by people who want to sell things to us. Most of us, especially women but increasing numbers of men as well, have internalised this message and look at ourselves from the outside in, checking ourselves constantly, to see if we live up to the images. We mostly don’t…and if we do, we still can’t relax our vigilence and control. This measuring ourselves against external images prevents us from living full lives.
We put ourselves on diet after diet, always blaming ourselves when the weight comes back, not realising there’s good reason for that, its beyond our conscious control, and its absolutely not our fault.
On top of the consumer and diet industries, the medical industry is also caught up in old science, dogma and bias around weight, which compounds the issues we have with our bodies. We can live full lives, without a constant obsession and reference to our diet, weight and image.
I coach people to get healthy and live a full life no matter their size, weight or body type or image. I also work with people to look at (i.e. gently process and feel) emotions underlying obsessive eating if it is impacting their health and happiness. It can take some time to unravel the deep cultural conditioning, but we are left with a sense of freedom and self acceptance- which is far more valuable than being skinny and ever-vigilant (not to mention hungry and under-nourished).
We also live in an ageist culture that overvalues youthful vitality and undervalues the wisdom and experience of maturity and ageing. We get caught up trying to stay young, especially to look young, instead of embracing our ageing bodies and supporting them with understanding and acceptance.
Peace comes from acceptance and maturity, and on the way we can ride the waves of our changing bodies and learn to support them, without unecessary restrictions or extreme behaviours. We have all seen older people who shine with inner light, love and contentment.
Its not uncommon to find people still trying to control their weight and “on a diet” well into their 60s, 70s and beyond, because they still want to be some idealized size. This is not the right way to spend our lives, especially our older years- we can focus on eating good food, moving as best we can, noticing what makes our bodies feel good, and being happy.
Wherever we are in the timeline of our bodies, we can learn to listen to the messages they are giving us, nourish and support them, and also get the medical or complementary medical care they need.
Living & eating intuitively mindfully, freely, with self compassion
Along the way most of us have lost touch with listening to our natural appetite, our intuitive wisdom of how to look after ourselves, guided by the bodies natural signals.
We live in a culture where disordered eating has become normalised even by the medical profession, who don’t realise how much harm they do psychologically by telling everyone over an arbritary weight (BMI) to ‘just lose weight’. Weight loss has never been found to be sustainable in any studies longer than a year or two, for most people.
I support and coach people to get in touch with their hunger and listen to their own body, mindfully, rather than rely on external rules and cues. This can take some unravelling of beliefs, conditioning and behaviour patterns around food and eating. Where we end up is in the freedom of our natural flow, just like kids who eat and move naturally. This brings so much more enjoyment of life.
Self care and true self compassion means we treat ourselves with kindness.